Emotions

How come with OCD our emotions control everything we do. I know with me that if anything happens i.e. get an email from work or a phone call/ text from unknown number, I immediately think the worst. Or if someone new comes up to me to talk or asks questions again I think the worst. Questions go through my mind like who is this person, are they going to stalk me, are they going to take something from me or try to hurt me in anyway. Automatically thats what I think. I feel as I get older the worse it gets. Why do I feel this way instead of thinking in the positive like, maybe this person needs help, or its nice to meet a new person and hold a conversation for no rhyme or reason. I am always getting these awful feelings in my stomach about work, like when am I going to get in trouble or how are they going to screw me over. Even though I am doing a very good job and have no evidence to base this off of. I feel I never used to do that, and I want to get back to not feeling that way. But anyone with OCD knows that the moment you try to stop doing that and 1 little bad thing happens, in your mind its because you stopped your ritual. Hope is that one day this goes away and I can just enjoy life and the ride that comes along with it without feeling everything is against me.

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